At a jailhouse somewhere in Nebraska
*Officer Peter Ross sits at his desk watching the clock until his shift ends*
*Automatic door opens*
Vince: Hello, Officer Ross. My name is VINCENT KENNEDY MCMAHON. And I'm here to post bail for Mr. Elvis Presley. I wonder if he has the 'Jailhouse Blues'? HO-HO-HO!!!
*Officer Ross stares at Vince silently*
Vince: Did you not hear me? I'm VINCENT...
*Officer Ross cuts Vince off*
Officer Ross: I don't care what the fuck your name is, and I don’t know who you are. There isn't anybody by that name here.
Vince: You mean you don't know me? It must be because I didn't say my SIGNATURE CATCH PHRASE...
*Vince leaves*
*ground rumbles*
*automatic door opens normally*
Vince: WELCOME EVERYONE. TO MONDAY NIGHT RAAAAAAAAAAAW!
Officer Ross: Um...Okay. I just checked our records and we don’t have anyone here by that name. We have a Josh Presle…
Vince: THAT’S HIM! He was supposed to wash the bird shit off of my private jet yesterday, but never showed up. I've already paid him in advance, so I expect him to live up to his end of the bargain.
Officer Ross: It’s going to take several minutes to process the paperwork, do you have time to wait?
Vince: If we must, BUT TIME IS MONEY!! While we wait you can help me think up something for you: A NICKNAME.
*cut to jail cell*
Josh: God dammit, this sucks. I gotta sit back in here with a bunch of Spanish people and all I can watch is Telemundo. At least I can brush up on my spic-spac….
*Cena sneaks in*
Cena: THE CHAMP. IS. HERE... TO BUST YOU OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!
Josh: Dude! Shut the fuck up. You want everyone to hear you? And how the fuck did you find me, shouldn't you be making some terrible puns on Raw right now?
Cena: I heard the police took you away, and now I'm here to save the day. WORD. LIFE.
Josh: WILL YOU STOP FUCKING RAPPING?
Cena: You wrote me that way, yo. So drop the attitude, we gotzta go!
Josh: Look, how the hell are you getting me out?
Cena: Don't worry, dawg. Now put away them doubts, I got a crack team of specialists helping me out.
*cut to Officer Russo standing in front of a cell block door*
*Miz sneaks up behind him and grabs the keys*
Miz: AWEEEEEEEEEEEEESOME, I GOT ME THE MOST MUST SEE KEYS IN THIS JAIL!
*Officer Russo casually turns around and spots Miz holding the keys in the air like a title*
Officer Russo: Get up against the wall, now!
Miz: Dammit Me...
*cut back to Cena and Josh*
Cena: Here put on this disguise fast like a flurry, We gotta get out of here like quick and in a hurry.
*tosses Presle some clothing*
Josh: A Cenation shirt and a pair of Jorts? I’d rather stay in jail.
Cena: Don’t be like that, Dawg. You know you might want to reconsider, because what’s about to go in your ass will hurt more than a splinter.
Josh: Fine, but turn around. I don’t like it when guys watch me change, it’s like I’m back in jail…Oh, forgot.
*reluctantly changes*
Cena: Alright, so here’s the plan. We gotta sneak out the kitchen, and out to the van.
Josh: You think we’re just going to walk out of a jail?
Cena: We sure are, now it’s time to flee. It won’t be too hard, because you know they can’t see me.
Josh: You really are a fucking moron.
Cena: Don’t be hatin’, in the kitchen I have some homies waitin’.
*cut to Tensai and Brodus Clay in the kitchen*
*munching noises*
Tensai: I can’t believe they left all of this food unattended.
Brodus: *munch, munch, munch*
Tensai: It had been a whole hour since our last meal, I thought we were going to die.
Brodus: *slurp, slurp*
*Kitchen door flies open*
Cena: THE CHAMP IS HEEEEEERRRREEEE, and he brought the special guest, now put down that food you guys are a mess.
*Both Tensai and Brodus let out a loud belch which sets off an alarm*
Josh: Your A-Team sucks, Cena.
Cena: Forget that, yo! We got the cops on our tail, I sure hope Vince posted that bail...
*cut back to Vince with Officer Ross*
Vince: I GOT IT! Officer Ross, your nickname is BELLS PALSY. Because that's what I pick on JR for all the time!
Officer Palsy: That's terrible, sir.
Vince: In any event, Mr. Presley's bail. How much is it?
*alarm goes off*
Officer Palsy: That'll have to wait sir, we have an emergency!
*Officer Palsy runs towards the cells*
*cut to cops surrounding Josh, Cena, Brodus & Tensai with guns drawn*
Officer Palsy: Put your hands in the air, now!
Cena: Forget that brah, that's some shit for TV. Instead, I'm gonna wave my hand in front of my face because YOU CAN'T SEE ME!
*Cena does you can't see me gesture and disappears*
Officer Palsy: Where the hell did he go?
*Brodus & Tensai also do the same gesture and vanish*
Officer Russo: What the fuck!!? They were right here!
Josh: *to himself* Hey, that really works? I should do it too!
*Josh does the you can't see me gesture*
*nothing happens*
Officer Palsy: WHAT'D I TELL YOU CONVICT? HANDS IN THE AIR!
*Palsy looks to other police officers*
Officer Palsy: Why is that retard still waving his hand in front of his face?
*Josh stops waving hand*
Josh: *sigh* Cena sucks…